BIG GIRL TIME

Let me just start by saying this: one of my biggest fitness goals was to look hot in the summer. And I’m not ashamed of that. My birthday is in the summer. It’s my favorite season. I love being tan. I love putting on an outfit and feeling confident instead of uncomfortable. At one point though, I wasn’t feeling like that anymore.

I had gained weight. A lot of it. I tried to call it “happy weight” from my previous relationship, but GOSH DANG LOL. Let’s be serious. It was weight. And I felt it. I felt it in my clothes. I felt it in my energy. I felt it when I looked at pictures. I remember going through old vacation photos thinking, “Dang, I thought I looked good,” and then realizing how much I had actually changed. That frustration hit differently because I used to be an athlete.

I practiced almost every single day growing up. Track and field. Dance. Cheerleading. My body was used to movement, discipline, structure. I knew what it felt like to be strong, conditioned. So when I stepped away from that lifestyle and slowly gained weight, it wasn’t just about aesthetics. It felt like I had drifted away from a version of myself that I respected. At my highest, I was 245 pounds. And I knew it was time for a change, not eventually, not “one day.” I needed it ASAP.

At first, though, my goals were way too broad. I would say things like, “I want to grow my glutes,” or “I want to lose back fat,” or the classic, “I just want to be skinny.” That sounds fine on the surface, but those goals didn’t give me anything concrete to work toward. There were no benchmarks. No measurable targets. Just vibes and wishful thinking. And vibes do not build muscle.

What changed everything was getting specific. Instead of saying I wanted to “grow my glutes,” I decided I wanted to grow my gluteus Medius. That meant focusing intentionally on side glute exercises, tracking my lifts, and programming my workouts with purpose. Instead of just wanting to “lose weight,” I set a goal to reach 200 pounds. Instead of saying I hated my back, I decided I wanted to lose fat in my back while growing my lats to create more shape and definition. Now I had numbers. I had muscles to target. I had something to measure. That clarity made consistency easier.

Progress became my motivation. I didn’t wake up every day excited to work out. But when I saw the scale move from 245 to 235, then 225, and now 212, that did something to me. When I noticed my lifts getting stronger and my back looking leaner, I wanted to protect that progress. I’m close to 200 pounds now, and seeing that number within reach fuels me more than any motivational quote ever could.

Another major shift was understanding how important nutrition actually is. There is no way I can build the glutes I want while eating like I’m at a sleepover every night. At the same time, I can’t grow muscle if I’m under-eating and about to pass out during squats. I’ve had workouts where I felt lightheaded simply because I didn’t fuel properly, and that was a wake-up call. If you want to build muscle, you need protein. If you want to perform well, you need carbs. If you want your body to change, you have to eat in alignment with your goals. Nutrition isn’t just about losing weight. It’s about supporting the work you’re doing in the gym.

What’s funny is that this whole journey started with aesthetics and…my boyfriend at the time. I wanted to look better in my birthday pictures. I wanted my summer outfits to hit. I wanted to feel confident in my skin again. Also I wanted to connect with my boyfriend. When we first started dating we would go to the gym EVERY DAY LOL. Excessive but so much fun. It was where dare I say we fell in love HAHAHA but after time went on and we became a long distance relationship we lost that connection point and both he and I wanted it back. But somewhere along the way, it became deeper than that. I fell in love with the feeling after a workout, that sense of accomplishment, like I did something powerful for my future self. The gym became less about shrinking myself or connection and more about rebuilding myself.

I think that’s the part people don’t talk about enough. Your goals won’t stay the same forever. They shouldn’t. You might start because you want abs or a smaller waist or a bigger butt. That’s fine. Let that pull you in. But if you stay consistent, it evolves into something bigger. It becomes about discipline. It becomes about confidence. It becomes about self-respect.

If I could give one practical piece of advice, it would be this: make your goals smaller and more specific than you think they need to be. Don’t just say you want to get fit. Decide how many days you’ll train each week. Don’t just say you want to grow your glutes. Track your hip thrust weight and aim to increase it. Don’t just say you want to lose weight. Set a realistic weekly or bi-weekly target and monitor your progress. Small, measurable wins create momentum. Momentum builds confidence. Confidence builds consistency.

I started at 245 pounds. I am now 212 pounds and closing in on 200. But more importantly, I am feeling like myself again, not the college athlete version, but a stronger, more intentional adult version. Yes, I still want to look good in the summer. Yes, I want my birthday pictures to eat. But now I also love the discipline I’ve built and the pride I feel for following through.

I hope this helps on your journey of being a bad biddy lolll! I will talk to you in the next blog. TTYL!